You see I was aware that back on Easter Sunday, in 1939, Marian Anderson, with perseverance and a belief in a greater cause, had already paved a path for me on those steps.  Ms. Anderson had been denied permission to sing at Constitution Hall because of her race.  Her request to use a white public high school auditorium instead was also declined by the Board of Education in Washington.  But with the help of President and First Lady Roosevelt, it was arranged to have Ms. Anderson present her concert on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. 75,000 people – - of all races – - stood there to hear her (‘couldn’t fit that many in the school gym – - I guess!)!  Ms. Anderson famously began her concert with My Country, Tis of Thee – - the same song I was now going to sing 70 years later.  When she walked onto those steps it was amid controversy and segregation. I was walking there as a beneficiary of her fight and the battles won by so many others. So, there, under the gaze of Mr. Lincoln and on the shoulders of Ms. Anderson and so many others, I sang!

When I’m 98 years old and sitting on my porch or wherever our son decides to put me, my great grandchildren will be running around and the conversation will go like this:

“By the way, do you little stinkers know where I was on Sunday, January 18^th 2009”?

“Yes Nana, you’ve told us 515 times!”

“Well, I’m getting ready to tell you for the 516^thtime.  I sang on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial for 900 million (the crowd will get bigger over the years) people – - thanks to Marian Anderson. Now go and get me that left over cake…and some iced tea… and my teeth…. and my wig because now I feel pretty and young again…and…what did you mutter under your breath, child….”

Heather Headley We Are One Concert Photo by Justin Sullivan

I hope you had a great Thanksgiving. There’s so much to be grateful for – - the list is long, and God knows I shouldn’t need a day to remember that, but it’s good to have it. The food was excellent. I think it’ll take me months to work off the mac and cheese, but it was worth it. My girlfriend (who shall remain nameless) is very bitter and jealous because she doesn’t think that her mother-in-love is as good a cook as mine. And she’s RIGHT! So, in my sweetness, I sent her a picture of the spread, my plate and me eating. She said some bad things to me – - some really bad things – - but I think we’re still friends, at least until the Christmas dinner.

The next few weeks are going to be tough. I’m away from home quite a bit and I’m already missing my “boys.” I start the Andrea Bocelli tour in Ohio (on my son’s birthday, Happy Birthday Sweet Boy) and we end in Los Angeles. It’s going to be hectic, but we can handle it and it’ll be fun. If you think of me, pray for health, protection, safe travel and stamina. I will be trying my best to upload a few shots and behind-the-scenes moments for all of you, so check in to find them. Yes! Yes! I promise I’ll remember to do it.

I end my holiday performance schedule in Trinidad. I’m so excited and nervous about this one. Ahhh! It’s always so sentimental and nostalgic just landing on the island. I feel the breeze, and it brings with it so many sweet memories of my childhood and life there. I was asked to do a private concert for British Gas to benefit the United Way on the island – - A foundation that needs all the help we can give it. Anyhow, they’ve released a few tickets to the public (so for the Trinis reading this, grab them if you still can), but it’s mostly a private affair. It’s been a while since I’ve been to or performed in Trinidad, and this one will be different. So, I’ve placed quite a bit of pressure on myself and everyone with me. But the band and all involved have stepped up to the challenge, and are proving themselves more than capable to tackle all that I’ve thrown at them. The show is going to be a mix of all the music I enjoy, and I’m excited to sing some songs I don’t normally have a chance to perform. I’m also going to be joined by some phenomenal local talent (I’d like to surprise you, so no names just yet), who are going to show why Trinidad is just a haven for talent. I need to get myself together so I can keep up. I’m so excited.

A few friends invited me to attend a weekly women’s fellowship here in town and I’ve truly enjoyed spending a few hours with these amazing, beautiful and inspiring women. Every week we come together, listen to a speaker, and then break into smaller groups where we discuss the weekly lesson and share what’s going on in our lives. Sometimes we get caught up in what’s going on behind our own doors and forget that there are people among us – - people of all walks of life who are going through some trying seasons. Every week I hear another heart breaking story of a woman battling some form of cancer (isn’t cancer tired yet? Why doesn’t it take a break!). There are women trying to save their marriages and love their husbands despite the reality they know. There are ladies, who are in great love relationships and are staying strong, depending on God and adjusting as the family deals with growing children, job loss, or other life changes. And the stories go on…. I know one day I may be in my own season, and I do hope that I can show the same strength, faith and determination I see every week in those ladies.  I know God helps and provides peace and love in our storms – - but it’s still tough.  Women are amazing, though! My mother was and is a great example of that. In the toughest season of our family’s life, she had to take the reins and she got us through.

With that said… I thank God for health. I thank Him for the health of my family – - all of them. I thank Him for an amazing husband who continues to be a dream come true; a girl couldn’t ask for a better guy. I’m grateful for all I have and for this season in my life.  It’s not always sunny – - every now and then a cloud may pass by, but I can’t discount the fact that even on the rainy days, life has been a blessing.

Let’s pray for each other.

The summer has had its highs and lows. Travelling, weighing decisions, begging God for direction, asking friends for advice…I’ve been tired, yet really excited. Disappointed, incredibly sad at times – - but at (so many) other moments overly excited, humbled, and encouraged. God continues to show me that He’s much smarter and bigger than I am, and He can do ALL things – - even things I didn’t know existed or were possible ☺. So, I can’t complain.

Because of my schedule and some other things that have been going on (I’ll have to tell you about that later), I haven’t been recording as much, but, I’m getting ready to get back in there (I promise) – - making the Fall and beginning of the year even more busy. So, speaking of singing…

Our sweet boy enjoys music and loves to listen to his CDs in the car. My husband and I will both admit that we’re getting a little tired of hearing them, but we adore him and we love hearing him sing along, so we bear through it. I’ve always sung around our son, but I thought that maybe it was time to really start introducing him to his “mama.” There’s just one problem, however: He hates my singing. I do solo numbers for him, I try to sing along with his CDs, I do voices, I try riffs, I sing high and low, and still he says ”Mama, no sing” to me. I play the piano for him, and he closes the piano cover on me preferring to hear himself drum the keys before he listens to my rendition of Fur Elise. I’ve pulled up CDs, videos – - I even brought out the scenes I did with Elmo, thinking ‘now, he’ll have some respect for my singing’…nothing! KIDS! I may need therapy for this one. For my whole life, people have asked me to sing, then along comes my child who is constantly begging me to be quiet – - and, I’ll admit, it tickles me. He does allow me to sing to him before he goes to bed at night, however, and those are the best moments. I wouldn’t trade them for anything. So, Mama will gladly be quiet…until then.

I was with a woman a while back whose sister was battling cancer and I asked her how she was doing. She said her sister was having a tough time (as was expected), but was thankful for the cancer. Thankful for the CANCER? What?!?! She told me that through her cancer experience, her sister got closer to God, found a renewed appreciation and love for her family, and started noticing things in nature, around her and in her that she hadn’t before. It got me thinking…can I be thankful for the “not-so-thankful-things” in my life. It’s easy to thank God for my husband, and our son, and work, and my life…. But how can I be thankful when I walk out of Whole Foods to find that someone has rammed into my car and run off without leaving a note, but gifting me with quite a bill at the repair shop? Am I still supposed to be thankful when a policeman, oh-so-sweetly, gives me a ticket for sliding through the stop sign during a BLIZZARD? Can I be thankful for the difficult phone call I had to endure, the hurt I experience, the disappointment I feel? I have to try. Gratitude brings us closer to God. It makes us better people. Happier people.
So I begin…thanking:

1. For a garden of beautiful flowers, and the nails to itch the mosquito bites I got working in that garden. It’s the best “itch” in the world, isn’t it!
2. The sounds of a precious little boy waking up ready to tackle the world
3. Warm comfortable beds
4. Good husband waking early for work
5. Good God awake all night working
6. Amazing people who love me no matter what
7. You
8. The post lady walking up the driveway with her headphones on and the garbage collector dutifully picking up our “remains” with his headphones on.
9. For the fact that I have a car, and found a really great body shop that made it all new again.
10. Good insurance companies who pay those repairmen.
11. That no one was walking or driving through the intersection when I slid through that stop sign.
12. The opportunity to be thankful…

I was doing well with my flying until I got on a plane to Manchester, England a few months ago and had the WORST flight EVER! There was so much turbulence, a flight attendant hurt herself and had to go to the hospital. The plane was dropping and rumbling and moving side to side – - I was so freaked out, I grabbed and held on to the poor man next to me. I found out later his name was Jim. “Hi Jim.” I offered to write his wife a note to tell her that I bruised his arm, so she didn’t have any wrong ideas.

It’s my problem, I know. Psychiatrists would say I have control issues and I need to let go and breathe. But I can’t breathe! I can’t breathe when the plane is moonwalking all over the sky. I can’t read, I can’t sleep, and I have delusional, but oh-so-right-at-the-time thoughts that if given the chance, I could do a much better job flying the plane than the guy up there.

Flying is part of my work life. I would rather not drive to California from Chicago, so I have to fly. But I have to be better. I have to exhale and trust God that even through the bumps, all will be well. I must admit that I did have a Eureka moment last night, however. I was begging and praying that the turbulence would end. And then, in the midst of it, I heard myself change the prayer. I started asking that I’d be able to handle the turbulence. This may be the lesson for me. Up in the air, and down on the ground of my life, I have so much turbulence and choppiness at times that can’t be avoided. I just have to go through it. And sometimes it takes longer than I would like. But I need to learn to ride it out, KNOW that I’m in the GREATEST hands and submit to being peaceful in the storm. I have to believe that I can defy gravity, defy logic, defy my brain, and HANDLE THE STORM.

He’s drunk with sleep. He couldn’t keep his head up while I was in his room with him, but he will not submit. He hates sleep. So I ask: Is there no reprieve? I know God is busy with many more important things, but can’t He make a little boy GO TO SLEEP for his exhausted mother?

I think this is the hardest part of parenting: the lack of sleep. I found myself walking around the house praying out loud to God, asking Him to grant mercy and let the child go to sleep. But before I continue, however, I should make a confession: mine is a selfish prayer. They say the more a baby sleeps, the more he sleeps and the better the child is. And I want that for our son. But there’s also another saying (created by ME): the more a baby sleeps, the more his mother can sleep and the better she will be!

Wait! Could it be? Silence!? I think we did it. He’s out. Oh! I hope he still loves me when he wakes up. I hope God’s not too aggravated with me being a little aggravated with Him. I should end this. I’m hoping I have at least two hours to make myself a better person.